Pre-Expedition
It was a typical rainy day in Glasgow, just like usual. I had just returned from my appointment with the psychiatrist, as I was undergoing treatment for PTSD.
While browsing my phone, I was surprised by an Instagram ad about British Exploring Society, and joining an expedition. It felt as if my phone was eavesdropping on me, especially since the doctor had advised me to step out of my comfort zone and seek an adventure in nature, even if it was a small one.
I applied and I was contacted by the British Exploring Society team. They patiently explained what I was getting into and how the expedition will be. I felt like I was taking a big risk, especially because I struggle a bit with English.
I started wondering how I would be able to communicate with my Fire during the expedition time, which I already saw as a long period.
I questioned myself a lot. How would I be able to make friends? Would I be accepted by them, given that I come from a very different culture?
I received a lot of encouragement from my cousin and my social worker to go ahead and not worry, as these concerns were just a result of my anxiety and would fade away.
On Expedition
One of my main goals in this expedition was to improve my mental health and I was hoping to find clarity in my mind, and I can tell that it has been a success. I had some difficulties in the beginning with names and communication, but those barriers faded away with the kindness of my Leaders and Fire, as they welcomed me with open arms and great patience.
In a blink of an eye 13 days went by.
We had 13 days of long walks, climbing hills, uncomfortable sleeping, tasteless food, and midges.
On the other hand, it was 13 days of wonders, mountains, rivers, lakes, amazing views, and wildflowers and animals.
Once upon a time in different circumstances, these were far dreams and imaginary pictures for me, If I had been told several years ago that I would find myself in a top of mountain, resting on the clouds, in a remote area where the only sound is the flowing river and the only light is the shining stars, I would never have believed it.
I never imagined that I would survive the war, nor did I think I would live to see my 20th birthday.
With every summit we climbed, I felt as if I could see the entire world from where I stood. And each night as I lay down to sleep, I felt that the day that had passed was not just an ordinary day, but a day etched in my memory, with every detail clearly recalled, Every time I looked up at the sky, I felt as though I am gazing at the stars from the window of my home in our small village that was wiped out by the war.
With my Fire, memories were definitely made and saved. On the long walks, we sang songs to make the distance shorter, we sang songs to make the hills flatter, we had to sing songs and dance for the midges to let us eat in peace, We created our own language that’s contains only one word: peanut.
Post Expedition
After returning home, the change in my mental state was significant and noticeable. I felt an overwhelming happiness. I realized that there was still so much more for me to see and explore, and I felt a greater ability to manage my feelings.
There is no doubt in my mind that these memories will remain etched in my memory, and I will always remember how they helped me forget the tragedies of my past and boosted my self-confidence.
On the last night of the expedition, I set a goal for myself to become an Expedition Leader within three years. So, on the first night back, before I got used to sleeping in a bed again and before my body had recovered from the midge bites, I found myself browsing the British Exploring Society website, searching for a new chapter of adventure and exploration.
